Quick answer
What is borderline personality disorder?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD), also called emotionally unstable personality disorder, affects how you feel about yourself and others. It causes intense, fast-changing emotions, a fear of abandonment, unstable relationships and impulsive behaviour. It is treatable — specialist talking therapies such as DBT and MBT help many people build a stable, fulfilling life.
What is borderline personality disorder?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition that affects how you think and feel about yourself and other people. It is also known as emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD). The name can sound alarming, but it describes a real and treatable difficulty with managing emotions and relationships.
BPD usually becomes apparent in the teenage years or early adulthood. People with BPD often feel emotions very intensely and find them hard to control, which can make relationships and day-to-day life feel like a rollercoaster.
Recognising the symptoms
BPD affects people differently, but common features include:
- Intense, rapidly changing emotions — strong feelings that can shift within hours
- Fear of abandonment — going to great lengths to avoid being left, real or imagined
- Unstable relationships — intense connections that can swing between idealising and feeling let down by someone
- An unclear sense of self — your identity, goals or values may feel changeable
- Impulsive behaviour — for example with spending, alcohol, drugs, driving or sex
- Feelings of emptiness — a persistent sense of being hollow or numb
- Self-harm and suicidal thoughts — common, and a sign that you need and deserve support
- Brief episodes of paranoia or feeling disconnected from reality when very stressed
You do not need to have all of these to have BPD.
What causes it
There is no single cause. BPD is thought to result from a mix of:
- genetic and biological factors — including differences in how the brain regulates emotion
- life experiences — particularly trauma, abuse, neglect, or unstable or frightening relationships in childhood
Difficult experiences do not guarantee someone will develop BPD, and not everyone with BPD has had them.
Treatment and support
BPD is treatable, and the outlook is more hopeful than many people realise.
- Talking therapies are the main treatment. Dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) teaches practical skills to handle intense emotions, tolerate distress and reduce self-harm. Mentalisation-based therapy (MBT) helps you make sense of your own and other people’s feelings.
- Therapeutic communities and structured group programmes help some people.
- Medication is not a main treatment for BPD, but a GP or psychiatrist may prescribe it for related problems such as depression or anxiety.
Therapy usually takes place over many months and is delivered by mental health teams. A GP can refer you for assessment.
Living with BPD
Many people with BPD go on to live stable, meaningful lives. Learning to recognise emotional triggers, building a crisis plan, staying connected to supportive people, and sticking with therapy all help. Organisations such as Mind and Rethink Mental Illness offer information and peer support.
If you self-harm or have thoughts of suicide, please treat these as a reason to reach out now — these feelings are common in BPD, they can be treated, and help is available day and night.
If anxiety or stress is part of what you are coping with, brightloaf is a UK mental health app offering practical support, check-ins and short counselling sessions alongside other care.
This article touches on mental health and self-harm. If you are struggling, support is available right now and you deserve it.
Common questions about borderline personality disorder
- What are the symptoms of borderline personality disorder?
- Common signs include intense emotions that change quickly, a strong fear of being abandoned, unstable and intense relationships, an unclear or shifting sense of who you are, impulsive or risky behaviour, ongoing feelings of emptiness, and self-harm or suicidal thoughts. Some people also have brief episodes of paranoia or feeling disconnected when very stressed.
- Is BPD the same as bipolar disorder?
- No. In bipolar disorder, mood changes happen over days or weeks as distinct episodes of high and low mood. In BPD, emotions shift much faster — often within hours — usually in response to events and relationships. The two conditions are different, although they can be confused and sometimes occur together.
- What causes borderline personality disorder?
- There is no single cause. BPD is thought to develop from a combination of factors, including genetics and brain differences, and difficult life experiences such as trauma, abuse, neglect or unstable relationships in childhood. Having these experiences does not mean someone will develop BPD, and not everyone with BPD has experienced trauma.
- How is BPD treated?
- The main treatment is specialist talking therapy, usually over many months. Dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) teaches skills to manage intense emotions and reduce self-harm. Mentalisation-based therapy (MBT) helps you understand your own and others' thoughts and feelings. Medication is not a main treatment but may help with other problems such as depression or anxiety.
- Can people with BPD recover?
- Yes. BPD has a better outlook than many people expect. With the right therapy and support, symptoms often ease over time, and many people go on to build stable relationships and a life they value. Recovery is gradual, and asking for help is an important and hopeful first step.